Desirable normality
To understand normality, you gotta answer these questions to yourself: Do you know your address? Do you have a bank account in the country where you live? If you have kids, do you know the name of their school? Do you have a car? If you don’t have a car, do you know how to use public transportation in your area? Do you know where to call if you want to order food? And do you have a local phone to make that call? What about the nearest hospital and supermarket, do you know where they are? If you answered ‘yes’ to all these questions, congratulations, you are living in the normality. People who are on the move don’t have this privilege.
Normality is what every mover aims for. Being able to overcome the uncertainty period and getting to be familiar with the new place is the goal. It is a situation that requires a special mindset, made mostly of patience and resilience. Patience with the people that are trying to help but don’t have all the answers or don’t understand the question, but also and mainly self-patience, the ability to understand and accept that some of the things are not clear and will be difficult to handle, and still feel that it is ok and that you are doing well. Resilience to keep going, despite the size of the task.
I hope the topics on this blog help you through the process. In all honesty, it felt a lot easier than it seems when I read these pages; our moves were done focusing on the next small goal rather than on the big picture, and then, suddenly, we realized we were not on the move anymore; we were already living in normality again. Those questions from the start of this post were all answered, one at a time, and we felt happy for each accomplishment, rather than anxious for the amount to be done. I hope and suggest this mindset to you.
Anxiety is a natural feeling during this stressful time; acknowledge that it exists (if you feel it), understand that it is a reasonable feeling in this process and let it be there; it should dissolve as you regain normality. Everything will happen in their time, poco a poco (bit by bit). Accept yourself, your difficulties and strengths, and allow yourself to do things in your way and in your time. If you care enough about your move to be reading this blog, I believe in you.
The moving time is, among other things, a time of personal growth, overcoming problems and strengthening of relationships with your fellow family movers, as you are all on the same situation. The task may be big, but it doesn’t need to be completed in one day, and each day you can notice you are getting a bit closer. It is doable. All my solidarity to you, fellow mover, to whom I wish all the best. As soon as you reach normality, then you are not on the move anymore. Then you can really say “I live in Spain”.